Friday, July 11, 2008

Open Letter to the Girl I Saw Yesterday

Dear High School Girl,

You don't know me, but I now know a little more about you than you should probably allow any stranger to know. I was walking near Ô-gâdo in west Shinjuku just after 5:00 PM, and you were walking about five paces in front of me. A rare gust of wind came along at such an altitude as to lift your skirt for the briefest of moments.

But it wasn't exactly the "briefest" of moments, was it? Because you weren't wearing any briefs.

Believe me when I say that, by walking through central Tokyo in your school uniform minus your skivvies, you put yourself in danger. And, considering the prospect of being arrested for seeing you in such a state, you are also putting grown men around you in danger (to say nothing of your contribution to the already unhealthy level of sexual repression that dominates Japan).

If you really must engage in such dangerous behavior, might I suggest that you wait until you're a legal adult? Our present day society has laws regarding you and your "going commando" in public, and age is definitely a factor. If you want to wander around Tokyo with no panties on after your 18th birthday, then more power to you.

I'll stand behind you 100%.

Sincerely,

Jesse Jace
Chorus, Isolate, Confirm

3 comments:

Rick Rottman said...

Is that why they have vending machines in Tokyo that sell used school girl panties? Why I know about this scares me.

Limo said...

I will also stand behind her 100%.

Jesse Jace said...

Shit, man. You know more about Tokyo than I do. I think I've seen a vending machine with brand new panties in it, but I'll believe the used underwear machine when I see it. That sounds awfully unsanitary to me.